Dealing dating after divorce
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When you divorce and children are involved, it introduces uncertainty and chaos into your child's life.by Tracy Achen Some common emotions that children experience are anger, humiliation, rejection, and neediness as they adjust to the loss of their old family structure.
They may feel as if no one understands what they are going through.Consequently, they may withdraw and lose interest in hobbies, school, friends, and the general enjoyment of life.It is important to be emotionally available to help your children work through their feelings.An excellent book that captures the essence of children's feeling about divorce is My Stick Family which puts into words the emotions that children experience.Even though it is written for smaller children, adolescents can relate to it also.Children have a tendency to blame themselves for the divorce, and will try to transform into the perfect child in hopes of keeping their parents together.
It is very important to stress to your children that misbehaving, a dirty room, or bad grades didn't make Daddy leave.
Let them know that divorce happens because of conflicts between two adults.
Assure them that they didn't cause the breakup, and that you love them just the way they are.
Though you are probably dealing with a fair amount of stress, anger and sadness, try to patiently answer your children's questions about divorce in a straight-forward manner without bitterness.
Here are some common questions that children may ask:1.
If you stopped loving Dad, does that mean that you can stop loving me?