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Berman suggests checking out author Nancy Friday’s collection of men’s and women’s sexual fantasies.
“That tends to be 90 percent of what people do when they’re talking dirty.”Ease into the explicit, every time Even if she’s more than down to try some dirty talk, that’s not your cue to go full steam ahead.
“Don't just dive into dropping the ‘f-bomb’ or getting nasty,” says Fulbright.
“Start by titillating her with tamer words, getting a feel for the mood she's in and just how far she wants for things to go.”Keep her guessing “Whether you’re caught up in the moment or simply lacking creativity, saying the same thing over and over again can make sex feel more like a porn flick and less like a ‘we’ moment,” notes Fulbright.
Her advice: Stay present and make sure you’ve got plenty of erotic words and phrases to choose from.
Guys get a bad rap for being brazen about all things related to sex, but when it comes to talking dirty, shyness is the biggest barrier to giving it a shot—and seriously enhancing your bonding time in the bedroom.
“The number one issue that comes up with guys who call into my radio show about this topic is that they want to do it—especially if their girlfriend is game—but they’re afraid that they’re going to cross some line and end up offending her,” says psychotherapist Dr. An easy way to get over a fear of offending her: Learn how to ace a more explicit conversation so you’ll be confident when it comes to turning her on with words alone.
Use these expert tips to ensure that your strategy for expressing your sexual desires is tactful, not trashy.
Break the ice Talking dirty is an intimate experience, so delve into it with your girlfriend, not the girl you met at the bar two nights ago. ”Set boundaries It’s not the sexiest stage of dirty talk, but getting a feel for what words turn her on—and off—will ensure you don’t offend her.
If you’re feeling shy about bringing up the subject, Berman advises starting out with something like this: “Hey, I was thinking about talking dirty and wanted to know if that’s something you’re game to try.” If she says yes, proceed slowly with something along the lines of, “Awesome, I’m so excited you’re into that. (And trust us—doing your homework will pay off in the end.) Ask her what she’d like to hear.
If she’s shy in her responses, gauge her comfort level by running through words and phrases that could come up in future conversations. “It’s really a matter of knowing who you’re talking dirty with and making sure everyone is on the same page.
Remember that there’s no magic formula for R-rated dialogue—one woman may be repulsed by a certain word, while another woman will be all about it. Because once you go through the vocabulary, you can really cut loose and have fun.”Get inspired We get it—the hardest part about talking dirty isn’t getting your girlfriend’s permission, it’s coming up with what to say.
If you need ideas, erotic literature is a good place to start.