Tehran dating - protective factors against dating violence
My first long-term relationship was with an Iranian woman I met shortly after arriving for duty in Tehran as a draftee in the U. The women who called the bachelor quarters were breaking strong taboos, but these were not loose women. When I arrived at the bachelor quarters in Tehran, Iran I was instantly lonely. Though the phone number of the bachelor quarters was unlisted, we got phone calls all the time from Iranian girls wanting to meet G. Though the Shah’s Iran was quite liberal, it was still a more traditional culture than the US.
A lottery for the draft assigned me the unlucky number of 29.They just wanted to talk to, meet and get to know American men. After exchanging greetings, neither of us speaking the other’s language, there was an awkward moment of what to do next.When I found myself standing in front of the International Hotel on Shemran waiting for the blind date I’d arranged through such a phone call, I was immensely relieved to see the lovely young woman with bouncy bangs, large Persian eyes and an even bigger smile heading straight for me. She suggested we go to the park not far from the hotel.Upon finding a suitable bench, we sat next to each other and held hands, smiling a lot while we people watched.There must have been at least four more dates like this.The time for each meeting was determined by a phone call from Fari. who worked at an electronic listening post in north Tehran.
I didn’t dare call her and assumed that these times were chosen according to when she could safely sneak out of the house to meet me. I had never met this fellow, but Fari and her cousin told her relatives that he and I were close Army buddies and that he wanted me at his wedding. Embassy and had at the ready some stock phrases to use on her family.This was a real problem for us as the relationship now felt serious, even though we’d only kissed, hugged and held hands. So, a couple of weeks later, wearing my Army dress uniform and hat, I rang the buzzer at Fari’s home, heart pounding. The Persian wedding ceremony gave me my first real exposure to anything Islamic and it was quite positive.When the couple kneeled together before a Qur’an propped up behind a mirror and opened to Sura 55, Al-Rahman (The Most Gracious), I learned that this symbolized “the influence of divine providence on the mirror of fate.” This resonated with me deeply as I often pondered why I was sent to Iran instead of Vietnam, and why my feelings of being alone in a foreign land were so quickly resolved by meeting Fari.These were profound blessings that I could not deny.After the wedding, I was formally introduced to Fari.I tried out my faltering Farsi on all the family members, which was met with smiles and charmed laughter.